I've baked cookies, cooked various Persian dishes and pasta dishes, and I even cooked a butternut squash soup and shrimp dinner last night- from SCRATCH!
I don't know why this chef light has been ignited within me, but I like it! Since I lived alone and battled with ED, I'd never really been one to make big meals that take time to prepare. I almost always gravitated toward meals that were easy and fast and low in calories-- and unfulfilling, most of the time!
However; since J and I have gotten married, I feel this urge to prepare a nice dinner for our little family. I actually *want* to cook, and it's really fun. Yes, I still think of the nutritional value of what I'm cooking. But I have broken out of the whole "I'll have 1 serving of pasta with 2 spoonfuls of pasta sauce because that's roughly 300 calories".
With the stuff I'm cooking, I can't really count the calories--because I don't know them. And it's so wonderfully freeing. I can cook for the sheer love of making that specific meal and knowing that J and I will share it together. I can cook because it's fun to create something from scratch and present it to someone with a "Ta-Da! Look what I made! It's from scratch.".
It's as if concocting delicious meals has been a part of my therapy. Food therapy. I like it.
And the amount of pride that I have when presenting these meals to J (and to myself, haha). It's as if I'm birthing a baby-- "It's so beautiful!", "Uh-huh, I created that!", "I have never been more proud!"
It's a bit ridiculous, really. But, hey, whatever butters your bread, right? ;)
Here's a pic of me baking J's favorite cookies: Peanut butter chocolate chip. They were crazy delicious and were gone in 2 days! Hehe.
P.S. I highly recommend cooking a 'winter squash soup'. It's honestly one of the healthiest, most delicious, and comforting soups I've ever had! And it's pretty easy =)