FUCK U Ed. Fuck you and your treacherous ways.
I went to Chicago this wknd and really watched what I ate. I came home yesterday and was starving so I ate a bunch of stuff including chocolate. I went on the scale today and was at 112. Apparently I gained 3 pounds while watching what I ate attentively.
I crumbled on the inside. Then I went on the treadmill and realized how strong my legs had gotten from working out.
Ed, I will literally kick your ass. I will physically beat you up. You weak little piece of shit.
I'm going to Virginia to visit my best friend tomorrow and I'll be damned if I restrict myself. I had all of these plans of how I was going to forgo food and bla bla. Eff that. I'm going to enjoy my vacation. Read: I'm not going to stuff my face, but I'm not going to starve myself. I'm gonna eat right along with everybody.
I have my dress fitting on July 21st. I will eat normally up until then. If I feel like a cow while trying on my dress I will consider restricting my eating 2 weeks before the wedding and losing a couple of pounds.
But this is not sustainable. I love working out too much. And I like being able to enjoy food with everybody. So much of life revolves around physical activity and food.
Anyway. I am going to enjoy my vacation in 100 degree Virginia. I will live in my bikini and like my strong thighs and body.
I refuse to starve. I want to have fun.
Love u all.
Will write soon =)